Final Fantasy VII: Please Stop, Square Enix, I’m Tired.
This is a day that I knew was coming, it’s been coming for a long time. I thought I’d be angrier but as it turns out, I’m just really tired of it all. With Sony’s last State of Play, fans were mostly elated by the announcement of three new Final Fantasy VII titles.
Sony and Square Enix showed off the improvements from the Final Fantasy VII Remake PlayStation 5 version. They also announced Final Fantasy VII Remake Intergrade starring Yuffie, Final Fantasy VII: The First Soldier a mobile battle royal, and Final Fantasy 7: Ever Crisis. The latter being a Frankenstein amalgamation of all the FF7 properties rolled into one.
So, why is it that I, a die-hard Final Fantasy 7 fan seem so defeated by these announcements? Because like so many insufferable Final Fantasy fans, this game is encoded into my DNA and I knew it was only a matter of time before Square Enix Kingdom Hearts this #$@%.
The Beginning
I remember the exact moment I fell in love with Final Fantasy VII because it was on my birthday, March 4th in 1998. Yes, I was a little late to the party. I had been introduced to Final Fantasy VII via a demo disc at my friend David’s house a month earlier.
I had my best friends David, Matt, and Ashton come to my house for a birthday sleepover. We had more caffeine than kids should be allowed to consume in 24 hours. We rented The Faculty and Mystery Men and we all had a Gameboy ready. But I ignored all of them and spent somewhere around 6 hours trying to make it through Wall Market.
Final Fantasy 7 was the first game that made me understand the true power of games. I fell in love with it all, Cloud Strife, Sephiroth, Tifa, and Barret, yes, even Yuffie. Despite the Mega-Blocks level graphics this game took me to another world and taught me lessons that still guide my day-to-day life in 2021.
I would go back and play this game yearly, sometimes more than once. Despite the clunky controls and the horrendous graphics, this game holds up. There’s a reason it’s a classic, there’s a reason people hate its fans so much because they’re right.
And to that end, this game did not NEED a remake. That’s the line I drew in the sand and it’s what fueled my anger when it was originally announced. The only fan who wasn’t weeping with joy, I buckled in for a bumpy ride.
I Was Wrong
Here’s the thing though, I can admit when I’m wrong. Even now, a year on, I’m still not sure what my feelings are on the Final Fantasy VII Remake as a diehard fan. On its own, it’s a fantastic piece of work. The FF7 Remake is a great game from start to finish.
But what I think stings the most is that what we got with the FF7 Remake would have actually worked. Square Enix could’ve just remade the game in its entirety and completely put to rest any worries or doubts I had…but they didn’t. They had to do something extra, put in a little twist.
I can get over that though because what they made was still so damn good. It earned them a lot of goodwill with the fan base, myself included. After the disappointment that was Final Fantasy 13, 15, and my ugly break-up with Final Fantasy XIV, it was a breath of fresh air.
Then this State of Play happened.
It’s Kingdom Hearts All Over Again
Why couldn’t you just stick to the game Square Enix? Just make Final Fantasy VII, finish THAT game. Then you can start hammering out the DLC, the add-ons, the continuations, and the side-stories.
Final Fantasy VII Remake Intergrade featuring a Moogle-hoodie clad Yuffie looks fun, but it’s not what you’re supposed to be making right now!
Last month I joked with a colleague that their favorite franchise, Starcraft would come back as a mobile battle royal game and karma served me up Final Fantasy VII: The First Soldier. Who asked for this? We want Final Fantasy VII Remake Episode 2.
But the true dagger to the heart for me? Final Fantasy 7: Ever Crisis.
I didn’t think a true 1:1 remake of the original Final Fantasy 7 would have the same magic as the first. And yet, they did it, they proved they could re-create the majesty and wonder…but they choose not to. Instead, they put their clever twist on it, and now they’re giving what could have been that 1:1 remake but it’s mobile, over-simplified, bastardized version.
They put Final Fantasy VII Advent Children, Vincent Valentine’s Dirge of Cerberus, Crisis Core, Before Crisis into a pot with the original game. Add a pinch of Jenova Cells and as the live-action Powerpuff Girls show coming to CW, what we’re likely to get will be nothing short of Sephiroth clones level abominations.
But people are excited, right? Fine. Enjoy your games while you can, while you wait 10-15 years for the next part of the Final Fantasy 7 Remake. When you sit down to play Final Fantasy 7.5a Interflux, I won’t be around to say “I told you so,” because it’s too damn exhausting.
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Feature Photo by Joe Scarnici/Getty Images For Square Enix